Poem #1
I don't want to wait any more time, I don't want to waste any more life, I don't want disappointment, to drown my heart, But when I move and make a start, All the wind drops out of my sails the momentum stalls, my courage fails, I remember why I stopped trying to alter, my life to avoid that moment I falter, the pain of the inner voice of doubt, the reasons why I shouldn't shout, that I can do it to the world, "keep it silent, private girl", and if you win you can then share, the spoils of your new affair, but if you're failing once again, no one sees your shame begin, when your own voice lays in, disgusted, that your efforts have combusted, turning into scuppered hope, continuing a lifelong joke, this pathetic sink and float, flatlined energy, trying to cope. Mortified, upset, caught out again, how are you, Holly? says a friend, "ok....", I pause, what can I say? I cannot show them my dismay. Or thoughts of: give u...